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February 04, 2010

The Wedding Dance {He Said: Lesson 1}

Lesson number 1 was much better than i anticipated.  Our instructor Deborah Joy, from The Wedding Dance Specialist was great.  She explained the basic fundamentals in a way that made it easy for someone as novice as me to understand quickly. Deborah explained how everything can be very black and white, and very structured, which makes it much easier for a man to comprehend.  Trust me, this is true.

I think our biggest obstacle that we need to overcome going forward is Amy's fear of letting me be in control.  I have faith that she will overcome this hopefully as easily as i have overcome my fear of dancing. maybe explain "and by fear, i mean my fear of thinking i'd be able to do this... don't get me wrong, I am still worried about the public performance - but, Deborah has made me feel that I really have a good shot at doing this, and even doing it "well." When Amy was practicing with Deborah, she had no problem letting Deborah lead, but when she was practicing with me, she kept trying to anticipate what i would do instead of just following my lead.  I'm certain that with practice (hint hint) Amy will come to trust me and let me be the "pilot" who takes her, the "princess" on a wonderful journey, as Deborah explained to me that this should be my attitude towards dancing.

Deborah began by teaching us how to find proper balance, shifting our weight to the proper points which allows Amy to feel where i am trying to lead her to. Her first question to me was "You always start with your left foot, Why?" and I responded "Because my right foot is my planting foot!" and she quickly said "No! Because as you said, you have two left feet." This little joke quickly broke the ice as we tried to learn posture and positioning.  We also worked on walking forward in a straight line without having to look at our feet.  We then worked on doing it backwards, which is a bit more difficult, but we got the hang of it without out too much trouble.  Then we dealt with turning.  This was not so easy and will require some more practice lol.

We initially wanted to do "Walk the Line" by Johnny Cash for our first dance, but the beat just didn't work and Amy kept complaining about every slow version she heard. So instead, based purely on lyrics that Amy sent to me one day - we chose "Whatever it is" by the Zac Brown Band whom Amy loves! Although we chose this song, after listening to it several times, we weren't sure about the beat for our first dance but had no other options on the dance menu so brought it along to dance class.  Deborah listened to the song and instantly started choreographing a dance to it.  I was amazed at how quickly she turned our hesitance about whether we could actually use our song into confidence that we could dance to it, and dance effectively.

All in all, i am very impressed with how much Deborah was able to teach us in just one hour.  I now have a lot more confidence that by our wedding day we will be wowing our guests with our dance skills.  I know I have a lot left to learn, but i think the biggest thing that I personally got out of our first lesson was the confidence that I will be able to do this (which i did not have prior to that night). Deborah is a powerful motivator because she has me really believing I could do this dance... and not just this dance, but that I can actually dance with just the right tools as a social dancer. As long as Amy and Deborah have patience with me, I know we can get this done.

Oh yeah, and Deborah did a little dance with Amy at the end to a club-dance type song while i sat back and just watched. I mean, really whats hotter than watching two hot women dance?
I am excited for our next lesson, because if I learn as much each time as I did last night, I'm sure i'll go from total novice to coordinated novice to skilled amateur in no time at all.  I believe the most important thing in learning any new skill is gaining the confidence that you can in fact learn it, and going by that standard, Deborah has already been successful in tackling the biggest hurdle she will face in teaching someone like me...a hesitant, sports-loving (some say fanatic) guy who has rhythm on a field/court but none when it comes to a musical beat.  
Stay tuned for my next post and if you want to read prior posts, click here!


  1. Wow! Thanks for your inspirational post! I LOVE empowering a man to be a confident leader so he can thrill a woman with the ride of her life! Strap in everyone...this might get addictive!

  2. Woot! Way to go FH ;~) So glad you guys had a good time!


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