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February 18, 2010

The Wedding Dance {She Said: Lesson 2&3}

I love to go dancing, but when i go - i hate when people freak up on you or invade your personal space. I think I kind of know why now... I am a CONTROL FREAK! Lol and I like to do my own thing - dance to the beat of my own drum if you will...

Lessons 2 & 3 proved to be challenging, yet very insightful. I feel more confident after those two lessons than i did after the first one and I can only think of one reason why ... I can dance to the sound of a beat but its hard for me to do it in slow motion or by a defined movement. Lesson 1 was doing basic moves... not to music and just to learn the most fundamentals of dancing... staying balanced, proper step techniques, shifting of balance, etc... I found myself stumbling and tripping and not feeling like I knew what i was doing. On top of which, i was told i need to give up control... LOL... um, yeah - i'm workin on that one.

The most recent lessons with Deborah, our uber cool and very awesome teacher from The Wedding Dance Specialists aka the best place to learn your wedding dance,  were still filled with basic exercises but we also got to incorporate our music - so i think the excitement of formulating our first dance really got to me. I still stumbled through the basics of walking to the beat; whether it was a slow or quick, quick stop... and adding the claps and snaps didn't help. It was like asking me to walk and chew gum... i can't really do it too well if i'm thinking about it...

But when there is music... a beat, the sounds of instruments and beautiful lyrics... it is just a thoughtless gesture to feel the music. I was either tapping my foot, my hands against my thighs, or moving someway and i realized... YES! this is what i know... and instantly felt better and not as lost as the previous lesson. Now don't get me wrong - i wasn't a dancing queen, quite yet - but the familiarity of just doing a head bop to the music came back.

So, the harder part came with trying to combine all we've learned so far and adding it to our music. For me, i felt that it made everything else make sense... for FH, well, I don't think it was quite the same experience. The movements to a rhythm added with me in the mix, i think just made his head spin... that and perhaps, the lack of sleep and stress and tiredness from his work. But either way, his frustration was present and clear. I didn't know how to explain it to him other than "you play football, there are patterns and steps... you count. Sometimes those counts embody one step sometimes its two quick steps" hoping that would help - but it didn't quite fully...

I was so impressed by how serious he was and how intent he was to learn. Deborah and I took a break, during which time, he was still replaying the steps by himself... I'm almost afraid that he's trying so hard he'll miss the music itself... the flow... the feeling.

We still have a ways to go and with two lessons next week, i'm hoping we can improve some at home. This morning while we both got ready, i played our first dance song and asked him to hear the beats. He said he really couldn't discern them... i asked him to learn the song. memorize the words/tune/tempo... and instead of counting or thinking in terms of slows and quicks, to maybe use the feeling of the song with the lyrics as his internal metronome. Maybe if he can enjoy the song - it'll make dancing to it that much easier...

And yes... i still have to learn to let go of control - I am not there yet. but we still have two more lessons - so bear with me!

Stay tuned for more He Said, She Said from the next two lessons which will be our last two before the big day!

1 comment:

  1. Teamwork and unity trump perfect tempo every time. Just smile up at him and savor the moment in his arms...Fear not, your guests are not bringing a metronome to the reception! :) And give yourself more credit--you are doing a great job!

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