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February 24, 2010

The Wedding Dance {She Said: Lesson #4}

It scares me to think that we have only one lesson left because I feel like we are really starting to get the dance, dancing together and more than that, enjoying it... but its true. One more dance lesson...

The first thought I had when I realized our Lesson #4 was done was "Already?" Granted, we were tardy - but it was more b/c I was thoroughly enjoying myself. What a difference a refreshed (or fresher) FH made! 

We started off a little rough. I mean the blank look on FH's face was priceless. He couldn't remember a thing... so I tried to lead him with what I remembered of the beginning of the dance... well I also forgot a big part - the TWIRL! I love the twirl. We got started and it was a little bit of staggering and trying to figure what we were doing... I mean, it felt really bad at first - like we just weren't melding well.

Well Deborah, our awesome instructor (whom I love even more every time I see her) from The Wedding Dance Specialists, broke it down for me... she grabbed me and said "Let me dance with you!" It was not more than 10 seconds before she diagnosed a big part of the issue... I was not in the right position nor was I firm and providing any resistance. This does not prove helpful to FH who needs to lead me, but if i can't sense his next move b/c i'm not providing the proper resistance to, it won't matter how much he tries. A very helpful suggestion was to try dancing with my eyes closed b/c this would MAKE me reliant on FH.

Oh, did i mention? I took my fabulous Wedding shoes with me? yup, my gorgeous 4.5 inch stilettos... yea, I made it through, but started to feel pressure obviously - my main concern - b/c they weren't tied to my feet  - the possibility of them slipping off. But the height also helped FH get used to how tall I'd be the day of and i think it helped him hold his position b/c he didn't feel like he was bending over to me... (and that was in my 2-3 inch shoes LOL).

The best part was figuring out the dip... I mean, we don't have to dip - but i want a dip... and twirl and all that romantic fun stuff. Keep in mind, the high school was difficult just weeks ago for FH - so i wondered to myself, was I asking too much? Well, Deborah had FH dip her but as they landed the dip, she quickly realized that she forgot to instruct him on the proper way to get up... so they stayed that way for at least 30 seconds ... just kinda stuck with me giggling on the sidelines.

FH and I got home ... and at a decent hour. So i put my fabulous shoes back on - we cleared out the rug, put our song on repeat and began practicing. There were some frustrating moments - but being alone and practicing was VERY helpful. We expressed what we didn't like about certain patterns and steps, how we thought we'd like to implement certain steps and where in the song... but more than that, we were able to criticize each other openly about what we thought the other was doing wrong and then communicate about how the other person can help that problem. Our neighbors probably are wondering ... what the heck? Repeat like 30 times? but it had to be done... and I feel much more confident but ready to tackle how to make our dance appear fluid and our transitions from patterns, twirls and dips seamless  (or at least appear that way) :-)

A reader commented on The Wedding Dance {He Said: Lesson #4} and asked a question I want to address: Firstly, if any man was opposed to dance lessons - it was my FH. I love him dearly and he'll try but he just never enjoyed dancing nor did he ever seem interested even though I really love it. He can play baseball, football or basketball - but put it to some music and a blank look would cross his face. so i feel ya. However, when I asked him if he'd at least like to look at least somewhat like he knows what he is doing on the dance floor - I think he was ready to tackle this demon... dancing demon LOL. Our main concern was the same: Can Rhythm be taught to someone who is self-proclaimed as having no rhythm? And Deborah said this one thing that really stuck for me: #1. It can be learned but takes time and it develops with that time (practice makes perfect my mom always said) #2. As long as I follow his lead, we may not be to the MAIN tempo/beat/rhythm of the music but we would be fluid and together and 99% of the people watching wouldn't even notice the slight off beat b/c we'd be at the same "mis-beat" and working together... I think this is key. Even if FH goes off rhythm or starts doing something crazy... it will look "correct" since i'll be following...

BTW, i'm still working on the following and closing my eyes while we practiced at home helped A LOT!

Stay tune for more He Said, She Said on our First Wedding Dance - instructed by Deborah from The Wedding Dance Specialists (aka best wedding dance teacher EVER!)


  1. What great memories! It will all come together and it will be so much FUN!

  2. Great thinking about bringing your wedding day shoes to practice in : ) Dont worry about the dance not going perfectly - no one but the two of you have recited all the moves...guests will more be looking at your faces so just be sure to smile a lot and look madly, deeply in love {wich won't be hard for you!} : )


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